They say snow is Nature's peanut butter. That is, it can be either soft or crunchy, kids love it and it clings to the roof of your house.

Four Relationships 
Help Parents Find Answers

As the parent of a school-age child, you know about some of the problems that children have from time to time as they grow and develop.  Even though you may wish your child did not have problems, you are not terribly surprised by an occasional problem.  To quote a cliché, "it goes with the territory" of being the parent of a developing child.

As adults, we often embrace our children's problems.  We suffer with our children; we agonize for them; we worry about them; and we are often frustrated when we do not know how to help them solve their problems.  

Let's look at some ways in which we can seek solutions to problems that plague our children.  We know that behavior is evidence of a problem and is often a valuable clue.  Since all behavior is caused, a child's behavior often points to the root of the problem.  

Problems often arise from four relationships that a child experiences during his or her formative years.  These relationships are significant and powerful and all four are interrelated and cannot be separated. 

These four relationships are as follows:

1. The relationship the child has with self.  The way a child sees himself or herself and his or her self-esteem, self-respect, self-identity and self-confidence are powerful factors in success and satisfaction. 
2. The relationship the child has with peers.  The way the child gets along with peers, with friends and with classmates is important to emotional and mental health and is a factor in success in learning.
3. The relationship the child has with adults.  The abilities to accept guidance, to respect authority and to embrace the discipline and order of learning are tied up in the child's relationship with parents and educators.
4. The relationship the child has with learning activities.  The child's participation in the on-going activities of learning influences the child's investment in his or her own success in learning.

If and when your child has a problem with learning, look carefully at these four relationships.  Be careful not to make a quick judgment and miss some ways of helping your child solve a problem.  Focus on the way that these relationships are intertwined...with one mixing in with another

As parents, we are inclined to look for simple solutions to our children's problems.  We are not beyond believing that the problem is a result of an outside force.  When we overlook the total nature of the problem, we may overlook opportunities to help our children build better relationships.

We can help our children by trying to see the problem from their point of view.  often what seems to be a gigantic problem to a child appears to be no problem at all from an adult's perspective.  But if we can see the problem as a child sees it, then we can begin to help.  A diagnosis of the problem with the focus on the child's four relationships is the point of beginning.  Even if you think it, be kind enough not to say, "You don't have a problem; you just think you do."  To the child, the problem is a very real one. 

The Master Teacher

The Importance of Questions

If students are to be encouraged to take responsibility for their own learning, they must be able to ask themselves questions.  To do this, many students need some help in developing the skill of asking questions.  Often students need help in focusing their questions in meaningful areas.  The very act of questioning involves students and they begin to assume responsibility for learning through increased awareness of the process of learning.

With practice students learn that certain questions are more useful than others and that one has to think rather carefully about the sorts of questions that are asked.  They also learn to appreciate that questions, more often than leading to clear answers, lead to other questions and to understand that the progress of science commonly takes the form not so much of finding simple answers to questions, but in developing new questions which have greater power and lead towards further understanding. 

Adapted from Idea Factory for Teachers

To grab the attention of your friends and associates, it is hard to beat a big fat mistake!

Anonymous.

 Becoming a Better Listener

We've frequently noted how learning to listen better can make students more productive and efficient.  We've just come across an article that offers some worthwhile listening tips that everyone can apply.  

• Limit your own talking.  By letting the other person talk more, you will automatically be a better listener.
• Become more comfortable with silence.  Don't feel compelled to talk just because you are uncomfortable with natural conversational pauses. 
• Take steps to build your self-confidence.  This will help you become a better listener because you won't feel the need to hear yourself talk.  
• Learn to concentrate and focus exclusively on what the other person is saying.  Focus on both the person's words and the way the words are being used....rate of speech, tone of voice, volume, etc.
• Paraphrase.  use feedback devices, such as "This is what I think I heard you say.  Is that right?"

Adapted from Linda Fracassi, Telephone Selling Report

Using the 
Right Calendar?

It's that time of year when we are beginning to plan into the new year.  Are you using a calendar someone gave you to plan, schedule and organize?  Using a calendar without evaluating it might cause you to become disorganized and waste time.  Here are some suggestions for selecting the appropriate calendar that will help you stay organized.

• Use a size and style that fits your workload and appointment load.
• Switch in the middle of the year if you outgrow your calendar. 
• Photocopy it periodically in case you might lose it.
• Be able to access it both in and out of your home. 
• Select one that fits your profession and appeals to you, in addition to one that's functional.
• Have one calendar.  Exceptions: if you have a foolproof technique to maintain a second one.  Also:  You may want to keep long-range plans on a separate calendar to avoid cluttering your daily schedule.
• Use the same calendar for personal and professional entries.
• Avoid desk-pad calendars.  They are too large, can't be carried and wind up being a doodling pad. 

Organized To Be The Best! by Susan Silver

Guidelines for Positive Discipline

Disobedient youngsters are often "discouraged children" with inaccurate ideas about how to achieve their main goal...to belong.  Their wrong ideas cause them to misbehave.  Thus we can't deal with them effectively unless we address their mistaken beliefs and not just their misbehavior. 

Here are some suggestions for establishing a positive disciplinary approach:

• Give encouragement to your kids, in order to help them develop a sense of belonging, so that their motivation for misbehaving will be eliminated.  Celebrate each stride in the direction of improvement rather than focusing on mistakes.  
• A great way to help kids feel encouraged is to spend time "just being with them."  Many parents have noticed dramatic change in a "problem child" after spending five minutes simply sharing what they both like to do for fun.
• When tucking children into bed ask them to share with you their "saddest time" during the day and their "happiest time."  Then share your happiest and saddest feelings of the day with them:  you will be surprised what you learn.
• Have family meetings to solve problems in a spirit of cooperation and mutual respect.  This is the key to creating a loving, respectful atmosphere while helping children develop self-discipline, responsibility, cooperation and problem-solving skills.
• Give kids meaningful jobs.  In the name of expediency many parents do things that their children could do for themselves or each other.  Children feel a sense of belonging when they know they are making a real contribution. 
• Decide together what jobs need to be done.  Kids gain greater motivation and enthusiasm when they are included in making decisions about such things.  If everyone can't agree on job assignments, put them all in a jar and let each child draw out a few each week.  Then no one is stuck with the same jobs all the time. 
• Teach and exhibit mutual respect.  One way is to be kind and firm at the same time....kind to show respect for the child and firm to show respect for yourself and the needs of the situation.  This is difficult during conflict, so don't wait until a crisis to use this approach. 
• Make sure the message of love and respect gets through.  Start by saying "I care about you.  I am concerned about this situation.  Will you work with me on a solution?"
• Have fun.  Bring joy into your home every day.

Adapted from Positive Discipline by Jane Nelsen

Today's children play so much with video games the IRS reports some taxpayers have even tried claiming the Mario Brothers as dependents.

Notable November Links:

The Language Center:   High School and College foreign language learners will appreciate the resources gathered on this page. The WWW Language Links feature resources for many languages, including French, Chinese, Russian, and Spanish. French language learners can access the French On-line Grammar Quiz and other Web Exercises.
http://www.ccsf.cc.ca.us/Departments/Language_Lab/

Count On:   This great website from the UK has many areas for students to explore in the area of maths (you know, mathematics). Top Jobs list ways working adults in the UK use math in their daily work. Numberland lets students learn about numbers (for example, koala bears sleep an average of 22 hours a day). Puzzles, features describing mathematical tools and many activities will appeal to students from kindergarten to eighth grade. 
http://www.counton.org/ 

Curtis Botanical Magazine:   Students of all ages can access antique illustrations of native plant species from around the world. The US Department of Agriculture has created a database from the information found in Curtis Botanical Magazine (published 1787-1807). Use the search feature to find plants by common name, species, or location, such as US state or country.
http://www.nal.usda.gov/curtis/ 

Gloria's Web Site:  Build up your students' writing skills. Teachers can chart their personal progress as they access and integrate the ideas found within this online professional development area. Learn new pre-writing exercises, as well as ideas to make the process of preparing the first draft, revising, editing, and publishing student writing more successful.
http://www3.sk.sympatico.ca/fiss/default.htm 

CyberBee:    This site really does deserve a place of honor all its own. This is a 
great site for teachers looking for more ways to integrate technology into their classroom. Look to the Curriculum Ideas, How To's, Treasure Hunts, and the fine articles to give you fresh ideas.
http://www.cyberbee.com/

The Canadian West:   How did Westward expansion play out in what is now the Canadian provinces? Access early maps that show European cartographers' best guesses at the western lands. Learn how the fur trade and scientific expeditions impacted the future of the land and the peoples living there then witness the urbanization and industrialization of Canada in the 1920s.
http://www.archives.ca/05/0529/052901_e.html

Happy Thanksgiving!

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